Kujira chan!!

08:38 pm: Great song <3
alright so this song has been stuck in my head for the past 24 hours..it's killing me. i mean it's a great song and all ( most songs from it's time era are) but god damn ...i wish i could think of another one! lol <33 so i put the lyrics in my journal for shits and giggles ..and to let you know just what it was i have been humming....


yeah its a little cheesy but come on its cute


My love
I’ll never find the words, my love
To tell you how I feel, my love
Mere words could not explain
Precious love
You held my life within your hands
Created everything I am
Taught me how to live again

Only you
Cared when I needed a friend
Believed in me through thick and thin
This song is for you
Filled with gratitude and love

God bless you
You make me feel brand new
For God blessed me with you
You make me feel brand new
I sing this song ’cause you
Make me feel brand new

My love
Whenever I was insecure
You built me up and made me sure
You gave my pride back to me
Precious friend
With you I’ll always have a friend
You’re someone who I can depend
To walk a path that sometimes bends

Without you
My life has no meaning or rhyme
Like notes to a song out of time
How can I repay
You for having faith in me



aww isnt that lovely ...now maybe it'll get the fuck out of my head.....

09:15 pm: applications ....gay!!!!!!
Applying for college..whoooo hoooo!!! awesome times...
im petrified for my Uarts audition =( ..it's december 4th ...omg! im so scared =( everyone encourage me lol!!!

brrr!! it's cold in my dad's room ...but this computer is so much faster then mine . theres no way my applications would go through on mine piece of shit computer. anyway ima go wait for Emory to call me and then perhaps ill eat a candy bar ...with peanuts...write in my little notebook some more and play vice city ...i havent played that in FOREVER.

xoxoxo

kujira

" I'm going to bake it!! in the toaster!!" - Direct Quote from linda this afternoon....

01:33 pm: ........
bordom has taken over me ! ahhh ::scary music of doom plays in background!:: ......ehh God

lol ill be around later..of course....see ya then

yes this post was completly meaningless!


xoxo

kujira

04:45 pm: ohhhh...you sexy Jedi you...

 

Doesn't Emory look like a Jedi????? lol!!

...quite honestly i think a nose ring would be quite attractive on him..not a stud ..a ring...Who agrees with me ??!?!?!??

 

lol

04:19 pm: Wednesday at Maryland
So on wednesday i drove to Maryland to see Emory . It was fab. i got there at like 10 , we hung out and watched Shaun of the dead. it was pretty cool ....silly english people...anywhoozies we had a great time and we giggled and stuff .

we were supposed to play twister but i left it in my car. Oh! Emory gave me a little pin shaped like Link from the legend of zelda cause he knows i love him. i was like " link<333 yay!!" it made my day really .

the drive wasnt too bad , for the fun we had all day it was worht the trip . Can't wait to hang out again!!! ahh well on my way to work....Weak!

xoxoxo
Cat <333

11:24 pm: " you'll be fine cat....just bounce up and down!!"




haha look at that<3 my favorite<3
anywhoozy tonight was so fun! i bought flowers for everyone up the store , skipped around with chris with baby's breath in our hair...he looked like a puck lol it was so cool.

then i got Twister...no one played with me though lol i was upset. i put baby's breath in fatt's hair...but it fell out =( so sad..Rob tried to eat one of the flowers...i yelled at him and made him take an oath saying " no i will not eat a flower cat gave me...and she is awesome" ...then raf put a flower in his crotch ...and totally corrupted my innocent fun and joy . oh well i had a great time. ...btw..hey audo.." CHUT UP!"

aiiight time for me to go play games and drink slushies...i love you all <33 night!

xoxoxo
Kujira Chan!<3

01:28 pm: Fill this out bitches!
1. Who are you?
2. Are we friends?
3. When and how did we meet?
4. Do you have a crush on me?
5. Would you kiss me?
6. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
7. Describe me in one word.
8. What was your first impression?
9. Do you still think that way about me now?
10. What reminds you of me?
11. If you could give me anything what would it be?
12. How well do you know me?
13. When's the last time you saw me?
14. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
15. Are you going to put this on your LiveJournal and see what I say about you?

02:10 am: haha what a cutie

 

emory = uber adorable

 

yeah , i got a new phone ....ask me for the new number .

xoxoxo,

kujira chan!

11:42 pm: Emory = UberCool
Said goodbye to steve tonight ....very sad ..very sad. ahh what can you do .

ahh well i am fatt's personal cheerleader , which means i am awesome.

i didnt do much tonight besides work ..weak! then i went up to dickson city to see steve, and yeah now there isnt much left to do ..so im writing BS in my livejournal and trying to think up food i can make myself to eat...


i wonder if master shake tastes good?....i bet he's tastey


xoxo
cat

01:39 am: tiff - " ahh man that kid's ugly"
So , tonight was pretty fun...

i was waiting for Rob to call me for like 3 hours ..and he didnt lol so i was all bummed and decided to go up the store for a while. i was only there about an hour and Rob showed up and i was excited of course because this ment he didnt back out of our plans so i was very happy.

we went to pick up his cousin and his girlfriend and went to the mall. i have a fabulouse talk about trent reznor with nick...that guy who used to work at hot topic but now works at Sojourner imports. anywhoozles! yeah we talked about trent and then rob made comments about his junk.

we went back to AG ..i paid audo to take me back to my home to drop the car off. that was fun. i came back ..played some DDR with rob . we played nonstop...failed..i gave up and looked at the screen ...lol

so then i met this guy who graduated from hannan and we talked for like 2 hours about how funny the teachers are ...then we sang the bishop hannan apostles jingle! hahaha i almost died

Rob said he was thinking ..and wouldnt tell me what he was thinking about...that made me nervous ...i was really hoping he wasnt thinking negative things about me. i dont know i just really want him to care like i do ..who knows what he's thinking about me ....i guess i just have to see where it goes.

he was awfully cuddly tonight ...but i'm going to take that very lightly because i dont want to get my hopes up. ya know?
im taking it very well .

hes just such a cool guy ....like really we get along so well..we laugh and giggle ...well i giggle lol
i can say we really just enjoy one anothers company.

alright im going to talk to awesome emory now... maybe rob will come on ...i need to get my fucking mind off him!!! grrrr!!! i cant though


xoxoxoxo
Cat

05:23 pm: everyone whos leaving ....
Alot of people are leaving soon ....and its a shame

steve is going to temple and jeffo to main campus i believe....

god damn im gonna miss you guys a shit load ...

04:44 pm: my notebook
lately if you havent noticed i've been carrying around a tiny little green composition book in which i've been writing random shit in right now i've decided to copy everything i have written so far...

-note to self never borrow jacket from alicia again.

- i totally feel like shit right now

- you know i dont know why i've been feeling so incredably shitty recently , sometimes i spend too much of my time thinking. like right now for instance.
i think the cause of my shittyness is the lonelyness i feel in my heart.

- maybe i can convince someone to try loving me ...that i am really worth loving..

-you know, i can be a very kind hearted young lady.

-Truth be known , yes i love sex but i wont do it with ANYONE i have standards

- i want to cry right now , everything hurts so much

-i'm sitting on concrete and it's really making my ass go numb

-Hey Rob Just called me!! OMG AWESOME

-we're going to hangout in a few hours!

-aww he's adorable

-God he's so fucking cute

- Why does he look at me the way he does , no one looks at me that way, what goes through his mind when he looks at me.

- for a moment in my life....i care about more than sex and being loud

- i just want to see what its like....

- my heart is heavy , but i am doing just fine.
i invision my heart right now and see it sinking..and a dark red almost black color. which is weird cause usually i vision my heart bright pink and airy =D

- do you know what its like to see someone you care for going in a downward spiral ..its like they're drowning..and i'm trying to grab their hands and save them..but they're just letting themselves sink...there's nothing i can do





i edited out a few pages , about dates and what not ..i feel somewhat better now

01:05 pm: hey
hey guys , im back =D who missed me?? yeah i know you did.
anyway last night was a good time...basically i saw justo ..then jeffo came up i smoked like...ehhh 16 cigs in a row lol i was being completely ridiculous. justin tickled the shit out of poor jeffo..poor thing curled into a little ball lol

at one point i kinda felt like shit though you know ..my friends didnt talk to me much ....and they kinda just left me at one point ..oh well i just have to keep telling myself "its nothing personal cat..."

then raf came up he was in a shitty mood ...i worry..he's a nice kid.
not much happened after that , i was acctually in a very outgoing fun mood last night . so i was just being myself and having a good time. i may have made poor jeffo a little uncomfortable ahh well lol basically half the night jokes were cracked about getting into jeffs pants ...sorry jeffo =D..no i'm not heh..

so the other night , i talked to rob for a while about shit i thought was semi important. he was really understanding and very sweet about it, so i'd like to thank him for that.

i guess i feel a little out of place and lonely right now. hell im very lonely , but im good i guess. i figure, im going to spend alot more time Dead than i am alive..so i better enjoy my life while i can , i plan on it.


xoxoxo
Cat

12:44 am: my lj trading card

LiveJournal Trading Cards Free Account Edition sandc108 User Number: Date Created: Number of Posts: Kujira Chan is a happy creature known for her optimistic attitude and freakishly large boobs. She's usually passive unless you piss her off or mess with her companions. then she will kick your ass Strengths: Happiness , optimisim , curves that could kill , irresistible charm , magnetic energy Weaknesses: She's real dumb and the slut of the group Special Skills: Kiss of Death and flirtatious behavior Weapons: Whip the members of her crew: Audo the leader,linda the retard,michele the goth,bran her knight/future husband/partner,ianko the drunk,pat the snappy dresser,and sabia the tall guy

Make your own LiveJournal Trading Card!
Brought to you by crossfire_

11:52 pm: hmm
well tonight was pretty cool . i made a new friend at ag , so we hung out. it was fun although we had nothing to do. we just kind of drove around aimlessly and talked about dumb shit. one of my favorite past times.

so im on an awesome diet pill now =( lol it sucks ass.
its working cause i dont eat , but seriously ..it makes you feel so sick. i feel like my stomach is eating itself alive lol
ahh hell i can deal with it. trimspa baby<3 lol omg i hate this shit lol

does Rob ever come online? lol
silly perm boy.....

anywhozzles! im going to the beach on saturday!! hooray!!
it's going to be so fun!!

i have to audition for Uarts soon...ugh im petrified<3

oh well

xoxoxo
kujira <3

12:56 am: do this!
Part of being on Livejournal.com is inevitably gaining a number of LJ buddies. Unfortunately, as time wears on, it's easy to forget where all of them came from. Post this in your journal and have your friends respond with how they recall first meeting you.

10:17 pm: i want fucking white castle now
..so tonight i needed to get a ton of shit off my mind...so what do i do??

i go to see harold and kumar

that movie was the shit lol it was too cute
direct quote from the movie-

harold- "i cant do that dude ..she'll call me a twinkie"
kumar- " a what?"
harold- " a twinkie ...you know yellow on the outside ..white on the inside"


first thing i thought was SHIT POKEY!!!! lol

ahh man i havent seen anyone in 2 days , im going through cabin fever lol.

couldnt sleep last night....i felt like shit , all i did was eat brownies/cream puffs/brocollli ( yeah ..) / powdery things with lemon in theme/ chips/ cheetos/ cookies/ and ramen noodles.....

hell i was depressed..lol i watched a few movies , a league of thier own , final destination 2 , wrong turn ( ive watched it the past 3 nights in a row..its always fucking on) batman returns....yeah yeah laugh it up ...but robin is mad hot.

anywhoozles im sorry im talking about NOTHING tonight i ehhh have nothing to say lol

love you guys you're the shit

kujira

08:29 pm: hey hey
Hey whats going down , yeah not much over here

anyway i just got out of the shower , i was gross after practice.
i was supposed to hang with michele after my practice buy hell im too tired, i just feel like staying home anywhoo..
i'll see them all tomorrow.

last night i got another flavor of jones soda...that stuff is the shit. i had green apple ...i dunno i think i still like FuFu berry best.

last night was fun . me , audo , linny , and tiff-a-licious went driving around yelling at people. i screamed "shake it daddy" at some old guy ..yeah ...it was a great time let me tell you . ohh!! there was also a large group of mall goths (tee hee) and we decided to be really nice and sing show tunes! it was great lol

Beach in a week <3 boner! ...hopefully i'll see bran and ianko while im there. that'll be fun!
oh well i'm gonna go do some yoga then relax ...see you guys around!

01:10 am: i know i know
I know i just updated like 10 minutes ago but .....thanks to greg ..i no longer care about this jake shit ....i'm going to be ok, thats what im good at ..being happy and ok.




thanks greg

11:13 pm: i dont understand....
I feel so fucking stupid.

Someone told me things , i took it the wrong way apperantly
he told me he missed me and he missed kissing me and all that
of course i figure "he wants me back" and all the great stuff. i was so happy cause im like here's my second chance at something i fucked up on in a huge way . so im really excited right? and tonight he tells me all about his affection for this other girl and how hes all upset over her. im like WHAT THE FUCK! im start crying because i was so overly joyed that he wanted everything to be ok as much as i did and now pretty much everything sucks ass again! yay! so yeah can you understand why i feel like such shit? i feel like the biggest jack ass ever.

so know heres our new plan!! we dont see each other!! AWESOME HEY THIS IS ALMOST AS GOOD AS WHEN HE TOLD ME TO NEVER SPEAK TO HIM AGAIN AND SHUT ME OUT OF HIS LIFE yeah as you can tell im thrillled w/ life right now.

i'm sorry guys im ranting and screaming..i feel like shit
im so sorry...

i'm just so confused and im so lonely...my lastrelationship was too short for anything awesome lol you know? not only that..the only time we'de talk was like a half hour on the phone every 3 days and i'd see him every 4 ... i guess i thought everything was great only because i didnt know him enough for things in the relationship to go wrong...no wait scratch that ..i knew him very well...we had been friends a long time before this...and we had been very close..but...he hasnt had many girlfriends and ive had many boyfriends ...and he was too innocent and vulnerable i suppose...and thats a good thing..there isnt enough innocence in the world...and once again i feel awful because i think of all the people i have de-virginized and that means im a main cause in the worlds lack of innocence lol . but yeah i dont know ....i just want someone to care about me.

i was talking to an old friend tonight in my car before i left. he and i had a "thing" once upon a time.....i apologized for it all. lately i've been feeling like major shit . ehhh i dunno i have to just keep a positive outlook.
i know things will turn out ok...i know everything will be alright. it's just i can be so hard on myself sometimes. i guess i just have alot to say to some people and i want to get it out....


Audrey , thanks for putting up with all my shit , i love you and i dont know how'd i'd survive with out you.

Donnie , sorry for whatever happened between us , you're a great kid please DONT ever look down on yourself. i still think you're great and im happy we're friends still...i'm greatful for having you in my life

mike , you're the sex , i smile just because you tell me to somenights.

Greg, i dont know lol you made for alot of heart break ..but you taught me alot..an awful lot ..thank you so much for everything . i appreciate the fact that you even talk to me after everything the both of us have said about each other and done to one another.who knows what the hell will come of us ,but i hope i can say i made some sort of difference in your life...even if it's teeny tiny.

sabia, You're the sex too ...sorry for dicking you over 30000 times and trying to cover it up by making out with you lol...

Bran , you're my knight , you're amazing , i love you with all my heart , you havent been around lately ...but i know you'de do so much for me . thank you for showing me im more to you than just " a girl from PA"

ianko, what do i say ...other than you're unreal.

jake, ..im sorry , goodbye

im broken ..im sorry guys ..i had to get that out.
if i didnt mention you ..it doesnt mean you didnt make a difference..you did im sure . i didnt mean to bum anyone out tonight or piss anyone off....but this journal entry was for a release..not so much to make you guys laugh like it usually is..im sorry...

Kujira